Capitol Meats: The Modern Day Ice Cream Truck

Capitol Meat Van

This is how most child-kidnapping stories begin

Going home from work yesterday, I was in the zone. I had an awesome meeting about the future of our company to close my day, and I was ecstatic with the directions we could possibly go. I hit shuffle on my iPod, and i sang every song that came up.

For your reading (and music judging) pleasure:

I Can Love You Like That- All 4 One
Lido Shuffle- Boz Scaggs
It Must Have Been Love- Roxette
Your Smiling Face- James Taylor
Whiskey, Whiskey, Whiskey- John Mayer
Move Bitch- Ludacris

Needless to say, it was a great ride home. As I pull into my apartment complex, I noticed a large van with meats of all varieties adorning the sides parked in the middle of our parking lot. Hmm that’s odd, I thought, but I go around it and pull into my spot. As I’m getting out of my car and gathering my work materials, I hear a shout from across the lot. I casually glance and the guy is yelling to me. As this incredibly sketchy guy approaches me, he extends his pale, tattooed arm to give me a handshake.  Continue reading


WWE No Way Out Results and Analysis

Hopefully D-Bry stays tied up in the main event scene.

WWE No Way Out was a pretty poorly built show, but still managed to put on an average performance last night. There were some ups and downs, and you could even argue that the show would have been great had it ended after the WWE Championship match. Let’s take a look at each match and where the participants may be heading in the near future. Continue reading

Lost in the Crowd

A screencap from a KFC ad in Australia. They’re suggesting something here, but I can’t quite put my finger-licking finger on it.

Game 2 of the NBA Finals was this past evening, and since I don’t get cable in my new apartment until Saturday (which you can read about here), I once again trotted out by my lonesome to another local bar. As I rolled in to Shenanigans (which I learned from a friend was talked about in Super Troopers), I got a pretty good vibe. It seemed like a fun place, not too sketchy, and had a cool blues band performing.

I got carded going in by a nice black gentlemen and then again at the bar, which is unusual, but I’ve got nothing to hide, so I went with it. As the lady takes forever perilously scanning my ID, I take a looksee around the bar to check out the crowd. Before I can get a great look though, the bartender hands me back my ID and I order a beer. As I’m drinking and watching the game I happen to glance occasionally around me and noticed that out of about 20 people, only two of us (me included) are white. Continue reading

Brian Roberts and Hope for the O’s

Easy with that pie, Adam.

Over the years, I’ve had the utter displeasure of watching my hometown Baltimore Orioles suffer losing season after losing season with nothing to show except a glimmer of hope that we won’t be as bad next year.

As every Opening Day rolls around, I still get that giddy feeling this could be a magical year. I may or may not have read, said, or thought any of the following things: Continue reading

Awkward Hide and Seek with the Verizon FIOS Guy


Tonight, the NBA Finals commence and the epic struggle for league supremacy between King James and the Miami Heat and Kevin Durant of the Oklahoma City Thunder comes to a head. I’ve been anxiously waiting for and watching almost every game of these NBA playoffs, and I have to say, my expectations have been met. A few injuries derailed some teams (Rose, Howard, Avery Bradley?), but I honestly feel that these two teams are the best from their respective conferences.

Unfortunately, I do not have cable for the majority of this week due to my FIOS installation being delayed until this Saturday after moving in this previous Saturday. Most likely, I will be cheering (probably for the Heat) at a local bar where hopefully I’m not ostracized for my choice. Continue reading